18-year old idiot moron James N. P. Miller (because one initial wasn’t enough) scored a DWI (you can’t even drink legally!) on Halloween while wearing his ‘blow here’ breathalyzer costume . Not so good lookin’, N.P. Can I call you N.P.? You know I’m going to anyways. According to a police report, 18-year-old James N. P. Miller, of Cincinnati, was seen driving the wrong way out of the entrance to a one-way street at East Park Place in Oxford. Inside his car, officers allegedly found an open container of Bud Light in the center console. Officers also found what was left of a case of Bud Light in the passenger side front seat and in the trunk. The legal limit in Ohio is .08 BAC–Miller tested at .158. He was cited for operating a vehicle while intoxicated (among other violations) and released to his girlfriend. I actually know a guy that wore the same costume on Halloween and try as I might, I couldn’t get a reading. I dunno, dead batteries or something. Moron In Breathalyzer Costume Busted For Driving Drunk [gizmodo] Thanks to Chris, who blew even harder than I did.

Some idiot moron , in an effort to become the world’s biggest failure at life , used 662,258 text messages on his iPhone in a month. Plus the jerkbag got the 12,301 page itemized bill sent to him, so he doesn’t even care about trees. I did the math, and it comes out to sending a text message just about every 4 seconds, all day every day. So I assume there was some sort of automated program involved. Also, a monster douche. Hit the jump for two videos of the idiot looking at his bill.