To celebrate how much New Moon sucked the proverbial shimmering wang , here’s a trailer for Three Wolf Moon , which, at least based on this video, might actually be worth watching . That said, I did go see New Moon this weekend BUT ONLY TO MAKE A BOOTLEG. Line starts by the garage door, ladies. Twilight: Three Wolf Moon [collegehumor] Thanks to everyone who sent this in whose emails are all over the place and I would never be able to name all of: I owe you my life a pint of blood one.

It was only a matter of time before somebody smoked enough weed to realize how cool a Three Teen Wolf Moon t-shirt would be, and here it is. Available from 80’s Tees for 20 silver bullets , the shirt is sure to be a hit at parties. Mostly sausage parties, but still, you might make some friends. Product Site Thanks to chris, who howls at the moon to attract girls. He’s a furry lover!

So apparently (I can’t believe I’m writing this) there’s a Twilight makeup line coming out from DuWop, the cosmetic line being used during the filming of the new movie, “Blue Moon” or whatever. Want to look like a vampire and save $16? Don’t sleep. Be transformed. Let the alchemy transcend. This special limited edition Lip Venom is a sneak preview of our highly anticipated Twilight Venom, debuting this Fall. Lip Venom V is not your typical DuWop venom. Instead of a gloss, Lip Venom V is a shimmering crimson lip stain suspended in a venom-laced liquid lip conditioner with a bite, and contains argan, avocado, olive oils and vitamin E. This product should be shaken before use to represent the blending of the human and vampire worlds and applied repeatedly until lips are plumped, revitalized and the desired intensity of color has been reached. WOW. I just bought like 30 billion shares of DuWop stock. Also, I’m not afraid to admit that I love the Twilight series, and I’d be happy to stay up all night talking to any of you (legal) Twihards out there about Edward Cullen and just how sexy he is. Provided we do it topless. Oh, and call him by his codename: The Geekologie Writer . Hit the jump to see the Edward and Bella Barbie dolls coming out this fall. And tell me: is it just coincidence Edward’s head is shaped like a dildo? I THINK NOT.

Following in the trend of tweeting from the bathroom , a 17-year old Romanian girl died while apparently trying to Twitter from the tub (this new loofah feels great!). The Austrian times says that Maria Barbu was, in fact, in the tub while using Twitter when she likely reached to plug in her charger with a wet hand, electrocuting herself in the process. As much fun as I do want to make of Maria, you really can’t blame her. Women understanding electricity? BWHAHAH AHAH AH AH! God, I needed that. Girl Dies by Electrocution While Twitting in Bathtub, Apocalypse Draws Nearer [gizmodo] Thanks to Julian, who once showered with a toaster but the bread got all soggy.

I thought it would be more. Waaaay more. That equates to 87 hours a year spent surfing for porn. A further hour and 35 minutes is spent looking at dieting and weight loss websites. The poll revealed teenagers spend at least three hours and 10 minutes a week researching topics for their homework, and another one hour and 40 minutes downloading or listening to music. A further two hours and two minutes is spent looking at clips on YouTube, whilst an hour and 22 minutes is spent scouring NHS direct or other health websites for information about illnesses, puberty and growing pains. Chat rooms, forums, MSN, and social networking sites such as Facebook also play an important role in the average life of a teenager, who can spend up to nine hours a week chatting to friends and new acquaintances. Nine hours a week on Facebook ? Jesus, what a bunch of rank amateurs. Try nine hours a day . Haha, I just Superpoked you, now Superpoke me back. Hit the link for a much more in-depth breakdown of how teens piss away their lives online. Teens spend average of 87 hours a year looking at porn online [dailymail] Thanks to Skynet, who has apparently become self-aware and is now sending tips. Yikes.