Someone better invent a device to record programming for later enjoyment and posterity, because MTV has ordered up a pilot of a Teen Wolf series . So long as the above scene is used as the opening sequence, I’m fine with that.

Well, if there was ever any doubt whether or not there was an original idea left in Hollywood, the latest news that MTV has ordered a pilot presentation based on the Michael J. Fox film Teen Wolf, should be…

I watched a little movie called Teen Wolf last night on HBO Family (note to programmers: families love watching aggressive dressing room wolfsex together), and even though I’ve seen the film upwards of the length of my life divided by the length of the movie times, only on this particular viewing did I realize that the basketball scene at the end of this movie is the longest frickin’ montage in the history of 80s movie montages . The high school team plays a full half of basketball without Michael J. Fox , then MJF enters the gym and people stare at him for like three minutes, then he declares to the coach and team that he thinks they can win the big game without him as “the wolf,” and only then, after about seven minutes of setup, does the montage below even BEGIN. An 80s sports montage is supposed to be two minutes of an inspiring comeback set to some dated-ass synth song that quickly jumps ahead to the big final moment between the rivals. The Teen Wolf basketball montage, on the other hand, is over six minutes long, and for the first three minutes, ALL OF THE SCORING IS IN REAL-TIME. If you see them score two baskets, they receive exactly four points on the scoreboard. And for added non-montageness, the rival team still plays decently and makes some baskets during the montage, just so this half of basketball in a movie about a teenager who is also a werewolf doesn’t seem totally absurd. Below, the entire Teen Wolf basketball montage (with stats to boot!) I’m glad they didn’t shorten this by one second, cause we never would’ve gotten the idea: Bonus 80s Movie Rule: Your A-hole rival dude is allowed to stand directly under the basket staring you in the face while you take your foul shots.

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: a cheesy but beloved 80s flick may suffer the indignity of a remake. Teen Wolf is under consideration for a new version, according to Moviehole . Before you light your torches and grab your pitchforks, though, be advised that the phrase “currently out to writers” is used, which means there is definitely no guarantee that the project will move forward. You may now breathe a sigh of (temporary) relief. Michael J. Fox starred in Rod Daniel’s 1985 original as an entirely normal high school kid who discovers he’s a werewolf. Once he fully embraces his wolf-itude, he becomes a star on the basketball team and gets lucky with his dream girl. Of course, Teen Wolf must learn some lessons along the way. The low-budget movie had the sheer luck to star Fox. When the unproven TV actor broke out that summer in Back to the Future , little Atlantic Releasing Corporation quickly rolled the family-friendly comedy into theaters the following month. Teen Wolf cemented Fox’s broad appeal. Teen Wolf spawned a sequel, Teen Wolf Too (with Jason Bateman as the hairy hero), as well as a cartoon series . Two years ago, rumors of a remake starring Tom Welling ( The Fog remake) were floated. Maybe Universal’s upcoming The Wolfman is making current rights holders Warner Brothers think about their own potential franchise? I think the original was sweet but thoroughly mediocre, so a remake would be alright with me. But does the possibility of a new Teen Wolf make you howl with outrage? Filed under: Comedy , Horror , Warner Brothers , RumorMonger , Remakes and Sequels Read | Permalink | Email this | Comments

Yup. “Too” just wasn’t enough. Full story at Moviehole .

My imagination was caught by the title of the upcoming movie Monsters vs. Aliens . I’ve seen a lot of monster movies and films with aliens in them. I wondered how would some of these characters fare in battle against one another. How would the gentle aliens from Galaxy Quest be able to stand up to vampires? Could Superman defeat the monster from The Host ? How would Ford Prefect deal with Noah Cross? So I decided to stage a smackdown event featuring some of the best-known monsters and aliens in film in one-on-one combat. Instead of matching up characters with similar (or notably different) abilities, I paired them up the old-fashioned way: pulling names out of a hat. Two hats — I filled one with the names of every alien creature I could think of from movies, and another with every conceivable monster. Here are the results. Be afraid. Be very afraid. Filed under: Cinematical Seven Continue reading Cinematical Seven: Monster vs. Alien Super Smackdowns Permalink | Email this | Comments