I don’t want to ruin the premise of this little video for you but basically the infamous Star Wars word crawl from the beginning of all the movies starts falling to earth and the Enterprise has to come save us. Woops . I’m not good at keeping secrets either. Youtube Thanks to bowzee, who may or may not be Bowser’s feminine brother.

This is today’s woot.shirt . It’s Admiral Ackbar stuck in a Chinese finger trap. Unfortunately, they already sold out of the first run of (3,000) tees before I woke up this morning. But fear not, the shirt will most definitely be available again next week during The Reckoning (somebody remind me and I’ll post a link) so you can go pick one up for $15. Then we can all wear them to Geekologie-con and point and laugh at each other’s funny t-shirts like giddy little schoolgirls. I may even look up your skirt if you’re lucky . AND IT BETTER NOT BE A TRAP THIS TIME! It’s gonna be a trap, isn’t it? I’ll risk it! Shirt.Woot (different shirt tomorrow) Thanks to 4thirty, Garfield, Tony, Greg and CHRISYUN, who….IT’S A TRAP! ROFLOL. Never gets old.

This is a child dressed as a helmet -less Darth Vader . Why any parent would subject their child to this sort of cruelty is beyond me. One look at himself in the mirror and that poor bastard is scarred for life. So creepy . I think I speak for us all when I say closing your eyes and imagining Darth Vader’s shriveled rutabaga head in Return of the Jedi is a surefire way to shoot down a rogue boner. Morbid Darth Vader Costume For Kids Looks Deadly! [walyou]

This is a child dressed as a helmet -less Darth Vader . Why any parent would subject their child to this sort of cruelty is beyond me. One look at himself in the mirror and that poor bastard is scarred for life. So creepy . I think I speak for us all when I say closing your eyes and imagining Darth Vader’s shriveled rutabaga head in Return of the Jedi is a surefire way to shoot down a rogue boner. Morbid Darth Vader Costume For Kids Looks Deadly! [walyou]

For those of you not in the know, Adidas is dropping a line of Star Wars sneakers , shirts and hoodies this year that promises to be ultra dope. I’ve been getting the tip forever, but I keep getting too drunk and forgetting to post it. It’s worth your while to go HERE , HERE or HERE to see what all they have to offer, then watch this commercial and get super stoked about it. Personally, I want the AT-AT sneakers. FOR STOMPING REBEL SCUM! You hear that, Skywalker? And don’t you even think about tying my laces together. Youtube and Youtube (another, much shorter commercial that’s not as good but does feature Vader firing the Death Star at earth) Thanks to Donna, emerica, Ali, Tiffany, Miss Bowser, LSDiesel, Blastphemer, Troy, Steve, sluggerknuckles, Ben, Daniel, Spikey DaPikey, Patrick, sham, Jazzman, joe the human beatbox, fire in my hole, Alice, mavis, kevin and Conner, who know quality footwear when they see it. What do you think of these kicks, guys? They’re called Wheelies. Gonna be huge.

For those of you not in the know, Adidas is dropping a line of Star Wars sneakers , shirts and hoodies this year that promises to be ultra dope. I’ve been getting the tip forever, but I keep getting too drunk and forgetting to post it. It’s worth your while to go HERE , HERE or HERE to see what all they have to offer, then watch this commercial and get super stoked about it. Personally, I want the AT-AT sneakers. FOR STOMPING REBEL SCUM! You hear that, Skywalker? And don’t you even think about tying my laces together. Youtube and Youtube (another, much shorter commercial that’s not as good but does feature Vader firing the Death Star at earth) Thanks to Donna, emerica, Ali, Tiffany, Miss Bowser, LSDiesel, Blastphemer, Troy, Steve, sluggerknuckles, Ben, Daniel, Spikey DaPikey, Patrick, sham, Jazzman, joe the human beatbox, fire in my hole, Alice, mavis, kevin and Conner, who know quality footwear when they see it. What do you think of these kicks, guys? They’re called Wheelies. Gonna be huge.

Now hear me out: you add some lights and sound effects , and then wear it while you ride around on your bike at night wearing all black. How cool would that be?! If you answered, “Ice f***ing cold!”, congratulations, you won the right to buy me a Zima. Damn right it’s coming back! Let’s high-five. No? I’m not a girl you’re a girl. Top-Heavy: Star Wars TIE Fighter Costume [greatwhitensnark] Thanks to David B., who drinks Mike’s Hard Lemonade and isn’t ashamed to admit it except he did explicitly ask me to not mention it in his shoutout. Woops.

Now hear me out: you add some lights and sound effects , and then wear it while you ride around on your bike at night wearing all black. How cool would that be?! If you answered, “Ice f***ing cold!”, congratulations, you won the right to buy me a Zima. Damn right it’s coming back! Let’s high-five. No? I’m not a girl you’re a girl. Top-Heavy: Star Wars TIE Fighter Costume [greatwhitensnark] Thanks to David B., who drinks Mike’s Hard Lemonade and isn’t ashamed to admit it except he did explicitly ask me to not mention it in his shoutout. Woops.

HIYO, it must be burlesque week on Geekologie! First the Star Wars burlesque pictures , then the Watchwomen video , and now a video of the Star Wars show! WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO! Happy siren! Who knew Jabba could be so sexy? I did! Return of the Jedi? More like Return of the Pants Tent ! Who’s with me? Anybody? ANYBODY? I’m not a freak you’re a freak. Youtube Thanks to Joseph, who was hoping for a little Admiral Ackbar action.

Alright champ, your wet dreams have finally been answered: Star Wars themed burlesque . I’d keep writing now but I’m confident you’ve already hit the jump and stripped your pants in one awkward move. Nice socks. Hit the jump to see a whole bunch more, and the link to the entire 40-pic gallery.