This is a slab of bacon . In cake form. I know, I thought it was eel too. Anyway, I’m gonna have to admit I’d have a hard time driving that into me. Mostly because there’s no steering wheel or pedals! *zing!* How about airline food , amirite? First time I’ve ever had to use a barf bag in the back of my pants . Thank you, thank you — you all have been great, don’t forget to tip your bartenders, I’m gonna steal their tip jars after the show. Woops — did I say that out loud? I have a gun. Hit the jump for an eerily realistic Spam cake and an unbelievable bacon & eggs one.

Granted we’ve seen LEGO Mindstorm sets people have built to solve Rubik’s Cubes in the past, but never anything that moves with the speed and dexterity as CubeStorm CubeStorm Cubestorm . Whoa, nice echo effect. Kidding, I’m hiding in the closet (my mom’s trying to drag me to a doctor’s appointment). The Worlds Fastest Lego Mindstorms RCX Speedcubing Robot. Built entirely from lego elements with a lego web camera to scan the faces of the cube, The solve engine (algorithm) running on the computer is provided by the incredible “Cube Explorer “software which also provides the colour recognition required to determine the exact location of each coloured square. Thanks to Herbert Kociemba for making his work available to anyone wishing to use it! Respect! “Cube Explorer” has the ability to produce very fast solutions to a successfully scanned cube, usually around 20 face turns! Doesn’t sound a lot , but it is believed that around 20 turns are enough to solve ANY 3×3x3 cube combination. I’m still working on “CubeStormer” I would like to see it reach sub-10 and feel it’s close to that. but reliability begins to suffer when you start to push things just that bit too far….. You know what else begins to suffer when you start to push robotics too far? Humanity. Just sayin’, you ever seen that movie Terminator ? I haven’t — I’ve got enough nightmare fodder! Youtube Thanks to Osku, Logisticz, Gir, Ringo, Raúl, meeotch, Frank, james, Bolleke, PrestickNinja, raficus and Clint, who would have disassembled that sucker and built a sweet-ass LEGO castle.

Ever wanted to float around the world in a pyramidal airship filled with enough hydrogen to burst into flames and OH THE HUMANITY! Towering kite-shaped airships could herald a new era of luxury transport following the introduction of the Aircruise concept. Standing 30 metres taller than One Canada Square in Canary Wharf, packing 330,000 cubic metres of hydrogen gas and capable of lifting 396 tonnes, the Aircruise concept features penthouse apartments, bars and dizzying glass viewing floors Silent and pollution free, the Aircruise combines solar power with a primary hydrogen drive for a cruising speed of around 90mph Aircruise was created as the antithesis of a hurried, crowded passenger jet. London-based design and innovation company Seymourpowell wanted to rethink transport - on the premise ’slow is the new fast’ “Slow is the new fast”, really? Because, at least according my love-making, fast is the new — honey why are you crying? What do you mean, “small isn’t the new adequate” either? YOU KNOW MY PUMP BROKE. Aircruise: giant hydrogen airships could herald a new era in luxury travel [telegraph] Thanks to Doug The 64 Year Old Roommate, who may or may not have died on the couch a week ago (I’m gonna poke him with a stick if he doesn’t move by Wednesday).

Tell me that’s not the most frightening thing you’ve seen all day and I’ll call you a dirty liar . I may even throw something in about your mother . Fighting words. The Steampunk Cheetah measures 61 cm or 24 inches high and 127 cm or 50 inches in length. It weighs around 40 pounds. This mechanical cat is constructed with typical electrical conduit. It took 20-gauge steel to work out this spectacular image of the Cheetah. The best part of this cool Steampunk cheetah is watching her sprinting across on her paw wheels with great zest and zeal. The movement of this metallic cheetah is such that it is going to grab his enemies. At first I thought the beast was just a static sculpture but it turns out the robo-bastard is actually movable, making him just an AI processor and a few servos away from my worst nightmare. And speaking of worst nightmares: I heard if you die in a dream you die in real life but that’s not true because it happened to me once . Twice . Three times a laaaaady. Hit the jump for another shot.

Upset that devil worshiping is traditionally a boys-only game? Well fret not, ladies , cause now there’s a Ouija board just for you! It’s pink! Girls love pink ! Plus shoes! It has always been mysterious. It has always been mystifying. And now the OUIJA Board is just for you, girl. With 72 fun questions included, you’ll never run out of things to ask. Who will call/text me next? Will I be a famous actor someday? Who wishes they could trade places with me? Gather your friends around, draw a card, place your fingers on the planchette and ask your question. Concentrate very hard and watch as the answer is revealed in the message window. Make up your own questions, and let the OUIJA Board satisfy your curiosity in virtually endless ways. OUIJA Board will answer. It’s just a game - or is it? It’s not just a game. It’s like an empty soup can and long string STRAIGHT TO THE DEVIL’S MOUTH. Don’t believe me? One time growing up a friend and I asked what we were gonna get for Christmas that year. You know what it said? ‘SOQMNETR’. Which, last time I checked, is not how you spell ‘ALL THE HE-MAN TOYS EVER MADE INCLUDING THE CASTLE GRAYSKULL PLAYSET’. Then we threw it in the fire and heard screaming. Toys R Us via Toys R Us Can’t Be Serious. But They Are. [babble] Thanks to zeppomarks, who asked a Magic 8 Ball if I’d post this tip. ‘It is decidedly so’.

Now I’m not saying you should go out and rob a bank, but I am saying I have a birthday coming up in seven months and money is always the right size. Interpret as you will (at least get a payday loan, cheapskate). Made by Sugarcoatidli3z, the same creator as this Pikachu ski mask (you have washed that sweathshirt, right?), Cthulhu here is sure to haunt your dreams and make children cry hysterically with equal dexterity. Which, provided it chase the naked mermen out of my dreams in the process, is a win-win situation. Haha, not you, King Triton, you and I have some unfinished business to attend to. So, Ariel’s like, what, 37 now? I’ll give you six dolphins for her. Sugarcoatidli3z’s deviantART (with the pattern to make your own) Thanks to sham, who once knitted an elephant ski mask. DO WANT.

Allegedly this is a white blood cell chasing around some bacteria and eventually subduing it. Of course, I have no proof that’s actually what this is because I’m not a microbioscientist. For all I know it’s a really bad copy of a Benny Hill chase scene from the end of his show. But where’s the music? A DOO DOO DOOTLE OOT DOO DOO DOOTLE OOT. Oh yeah, there it is. Youtube Thanks to Ian, who destroys bacteria like colloidal silver. Haha, I know science!

Jonathan Trappe went and attached 55 industrial strength helium balloons to an office chair and took to the skies above North Carolina . Just like a bird. After spending two years in training and upwards of £45,000 (~$74K) on the adventure, this was the technical project manager’s first ever cluster balloon flight. He reached a height of 14,783 feet after strapping the industrial-strength balloons to the steel-cased chair and setting off from an airport in North Carolina. ‘I took two years before this flight gaining my Federal Aviation Administration licence to fly helium balloons as well as hot air balloons,’ said Mr Trappe. Using only a sharp knife to burst the balloons, Mr Trappe explained the difference between bursting a normal party balloon and one used in cluster ballooning. ‘Every time you burst the balloon there follows a juddering shot,’ he said. Not to burst your balloon, Jonathan, but real adventurers don’t spend $75K and two years training for an adventure. Nope, real adventurers spend $200 at Party Central and a drunken afternoon tying balloons to a patio chair. Just sayin’, you make Balloon Boy look like Indiana Jones. And that little bitch just hid in an attic . Hit the jump for a couple more shots from the “adventure”.

Jonathan Trappe went and attached 55 industrial strength helium balloons to an office chair and took to the skies above North Carolina . Just like a bird. After spending two years in training and upwards of £45,000 (~$74K) on the adventure, this was the technical project manager’s first ever cluster balloon flight. He reached a height of 14,783 feet after strapping the industrial-strength balloons to the steel-cased chair and setting off from an airport in North Carolina. ‘I took two years before this flight gaining my Federal Aviation Administration licence to fly helium balloons as well as hot air balloons,’ said Mr Trappe. Using only a sharp knife to burst the balloons, Mr Trappe explained the difference between bursting a normal party balloon and one used in cluster ballooning. ‘Every time you burst the balloon there follows a juddering shot,’ he said. Not to burst your balloon, Jonathan, but real adventurers don’t spend $75K and two years training for an adventure. Nope, real adventurers spend $200 at Party Central and a drunken afternoon tying balloons to a patio chair. Just sayin’, you make Balloon Boy look like Indiana Jones. And that little bitch just hid in an attic . Hit the jump for a couple more shots from the “adventure”.

This is a video of a Tomy i-SOBOT that some deranged sicko made custom weapons for and then let loose to wreak havoc on a table in his living room. Why half the scenes involve killing innocent dinosaurs is beyond me, but if if I had to guess I’d say somebody has a death wish . YouTube user Paxshikai is the proud owner of what is potentially the most dangerous i-SOBOT ever, thanks to its arsenal of custom made weapons that includes crossbows, sniper rifles, machine guns, rocket launchers, and even a light saber. In celebration of his 100th (!) YouTube video of an i-SOBOT blowing things up with a variety of weaponry (or doing other weird stuff), Paxshikai put together this compilation video. Uncool dino abuse at 0:35, 1:00, 1:30 - 2:00, 3:10, and 4:05-4:30 (that last scene isn’t for the faint of heart). So, is this how it’s gonna be, Paxshikai? Because I have 0% fear of stomping the shit out of that little dino-killer. And you know what the GW punishment for killing a dinosaur is, don’t you? Paxshikai’s 100th i-SOBOT Video [botjunkie] Thanks to Ben, Spikey DaPikey and Zach, who all belong to an elite squad of robot saboteurs and wear fake mustaches and the whole nine yards.