John Coker undoubtedly ate crayons (and Play-Doh ) as a child. And when he grew up, he decided to make an 8-pack of giant Crayola crayon rockets and shoot them into the wild blue yonder. Sadly, only four of the eight rockets took to the sky. It’s okay, John, a 50% success rate isn’t bad. Kidding, that’s terrible. Maybe next time you should try those sniffable markers. Love those things. Hit the jump for a couple more shots.

That’s right, would-be astronauts , you can forget about NASA ever sending you to the moon strapped to a giant rocket, cause that shit ain’t happening. Your only chance now is lassoing a moonicorn and barebacking that bitch to outerspace. Obama wants to end NASA’s moon program, turn over space transportation to commercial companies and jump-start technologies needed for future human exploration of Mars and other destinations, officials said on Monday. Obama’s budget ends work on the shuttle follow-on vehicle, known as Orion, as well as a pair of rockets developed to fly astronauts to the space station, the moon and other destinations in the solar system. Funds previously earmarked for the Constellation program, initially intended to return U.S. astronauts to the moon by 2020, instead would be used for research projects that include robotics and other technologies needed to prepare for an eventual human mission to Mars Privatizing space transportation? I don’t know how I feel about that besides GW’s ROCKET TOURS NOW TAKING RESERVATIONS!! Week long space trips start at $1million. Now I know what you’re thinking, “I bet the GW’s just gonna get me high and drop me off at Space Camp”. And that, my friend, is a safe bet. Obama axes NASA moon plan in new budget [msnbc] Thanks to FDSY, who will kick your ass into outerspace for a cool grand.

That’s right, would-be astronauts , you can forget about NASA ever sending you to the moon strapped to a giant rocket, cause that shit ain’t happening. Your only chance now is lassoing a moonicorn and barebacking that bitch to outerspace. Obama wants to end NASA’s moon program, turn over space transportation to commercial companies and jump-start technologies needed for future human exploration of Mars and other destinations, officials said on Monday. Obama’s budget ends work on the shuttle follow-on vehicle, known as Orion, as well as a pair of rockets developed to fly astronauts to the space station, the moon and other destinations in the solar system. Funds previously earmarked for the Constellation program, initially intended to return U.S. astronauts to the moon by 2020, instead would be used for research projects that include robotics and other technologies needed to prepare for an eventual human mission to Mars Privatizing space transportation? I don’t know how I feel about that besides GW’s ROCKET TOURS NOW TAKING RESERVATIONS!! Week long space trips start at $1million. Now I know what you’re thinking, “I bet the GW’s just gonna get me high and drop me off at Space Camp”. And that, my friend, is a safe bet. Obama axes NASA moon plan in new budget [msnbc] Thanks to FDSY, who will kick your ass into outerspace for a cool grand.

This is a video of a Japanese man flying around a television studio with a homemade jetpack strapped on. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get the video to play here at work so I’ve had to rely on the word of my tipsters. So, give it to me straight — is it as awesome as I’d hoped? I got had, didn’t I? Gotdamnit. Japanese Jet Pack [stupidvideos] Thanks to Austin and TobyRaider, who are both jerks.

John Hunter is a man with a dream . And while most men dream of supermodel orgies (don’t lie), John dreams of shooting shit into space with a cannon . Me too, John, me too . PSSSHOOOOOOOOW!! John Hunter wants to shoot stuff into space with a 3,600-foot gun. And he’s dead serious–he’s done the math. Making deliveries to an orbital outpost on a rocket costs $5,000 per pound, but using a space gun would cost just $250 per pound. How to Shoot Stuff into Space STEP 1: HEAT IT The gun combusts natural gas in a heat exchanger within a chamber of hydrogen gas, heating the hydrogen to 2,600˚F and causing a 500 percent increase in pressure. STEP 2: LET THE HYDROGEN LOOSE Operators open the valve, and the hot, pressurized hydrogen quickly expands down the tube, pushing the payload forward. STEP 3: TO INFINITY AND BEYOND After speeding down the 3,300-foot-long barrel, the projectile shoots out of the gun at 13,000 mph. An iris at the end of the gun closes, capturing the hydrogen gas to use again. That’s all well and good, John, but the real question is this: can a human being survive the launch? And by “human being” I mean me. You think I won’t shoot myself out of your space cannon, John? Because I 100% will. Sans helmet. You really think a helmet’s gonna save you if a space cannon launch goes wrong? Because it’s not. A trampoline sure, but not a helmet. A Cannon for Shooting Supplies into Space [popsci] Thanks to Lee, who’s currently orbiting the earth from a comfy 22,236 miles out. Let me know if we need to shoot more beer.

I’m pretty sure this is every five-year old boy’s first invention . Of course, few have the technical know-how to make it happen. And even fewer are allowed to play with power tools . But grownup Ray Bavetta kept the dream alive and slapped a 3.7HP model airplane engine on a skateboard and misnamed it Rocket Board . Do you know what a rocket is, Ray? There’s usually fire coming out of the back. Not streamers. Rocket Board makes skateboarding a bit more interesting [dvice] Thanks to FDSY, who is fairly certain this is how he’ll die.