You know how they say eyes are the windows to the soul? Well apparently a Pyrex plug is the window to your teeth and gums. Who knew? …presumably refraction of transmitted light explains the visualization of both top and bottom teeth through the plug. Oh really? Well presumably refraction of transmitted projectile vomit explains the visualization of both puke on my shoes AND desk. Science, baby! (Somebody come clean this mess up). Lip window [tywkiwdbi] Thanks to matt, who, for grossing me out on a Friday, gets punched in the teeth. Smile!

Justin Timberlake kept his cap pulled low over his face yesterday as he stopped to pump gas into his car, but even that brim couldn't hid the sore on his mouth! Justin was also absent from his girlfriend's side at…

It's never too early to start your holiday shopping, and after looking at these shots of Lindsay Lohan's once luscious smackers, we're thinking she needs Blistex or some sort of medicated lip balm to soothe these cracks! I KNOW…

This is a Piranha Plant scarf made by craftster user enemyairship . Careful wearing one though, it might nip at your genitals ! Here’s another Mario related project of mine…actually I just noticed that the only projects I’ve posted here are Mario inspired! I saw a project similar to this one on Ravelry and just had to have a go at it. This is a Piranha Plant scarf that I made for my bf’s younger sister. She’s either a Junior or Senior in high school. If you want to try knitting your own she has the pattern explained in the thread(!). I thought it was taking a stab at, but I’m no good with needles. I ended up mainlining a whole ball of yarn! My veins tickle. Hit the jump to see a picture of the scarf’s maker modeling it.

We can't believe Ali Lohan would have gone out and gotten lip injections, so we're just going to chalk it up to the teenage starlet mimicking her older sister's trademark pout. I mean, Lilo's lips are plump simply because…

What do you get when you cross Cheetos lip balm and bacon flavored lube ? A BACON-CHEESE ORGY TO REMEMBER, AM I RIGHT? God, I sure hope I’m not. You people are freaks. Anyway, bacon lip balm is exactly what it sounds like: bacon flavored lip balm from the porky purveyors over at J&D . A 4-pack will set you back $13, but it’s gonna take a lot more than that to fill you up! I’m a pretty skinny guy and I still ate ten sticks for breakfast. PLUS TWO ROCKS AND SOME DIRT. Amazon Product Site via J&D’s Bacon Lip Balm [uncrate] Thanks to Rémy, Ste, tkuper and PrestickNinja, who are smart enough to know hotdogs aren’t really just assholes and lips. There are elbows in there too, you know.

Kooky-Chew Human Dog Food is actually 2 1/2 ounces of crunchy cookie bits for humans, but made to look like dog kibble. I want some. Plus, each bowl comes with a candy bone, and who doesn’t like candy? Or ice cream ? GOD, THIS WASN’T EVEN ABOUT ICE CREAM BUT NOW I WANT SOME! Each bowl will set you back a cool $1.49 and should not be stored in the same place as regular dog food. Because you know what will happen, don’t you? I don’t, but I’m sure it’ll be hilarious. Like somebody stepping on a rake and getting hit in the face! Product Site Thanks to Julian, who once ate a whole 20lb bag of dog food before he realized it was cat foot. I LIKE THE SALMON FLAVOR TOO, JULIAN!

First of all, Vince Shlomi, the ShamWow guy, is 44 years old . In the infomercials he doesn’t look a day over a very douchey 25. Secondly, a $1,000 hooker tried biting his tongue off during a sexual encounter at a South Beach hotel and Vince was forced to ShamPow her in the face until she let go. Damn, that is some freaky cannibal S & M shit. And lastly, since when is being the ShamWow guy not enough to get a dude laid for free? Next thing you know you’ll tell me Ron Popeil isn’t sticking his Solid Flavor Injector to a bunch of groupies. Now back me up here, Ron. Ron? What do you mean you’re a ‘Pocket Fisherman’? Hit the jump for a raggedly looking ShamWow guy and hooker.

Remember when I told you I’d make up for my lack of Tokyoflash posts lately? BA-DOW! I am a man of my word. And, as a man of his word (when his fingers aren’t crossed), here comes Flash’s latest: The Hanko. Sharp black acrylic lenses reminiscent of a Japanese signature stamp give this watch its name and a newly designed stainless steel case with custom curves provide an additional design edge. One touch of the upper button animates the sub-surface LEDs in a clockwise direction before the time is presented. Hours are shown in the centre circle of the watch, groups of five minutes are shown in the outer circle in the same position as numbers on a clock and single minutes are shown in the areas between. Peep the diagram above to better understand how to read the time. The Hanko is available with blue, white or multi-colored LEDs and is one of Tokyoflash’s most moderately priced time-receptacles, at about $97. So it might be a good model to get your feet wet — you know, test the waters. Just be careful of the undertow. It caught hold of me and now I’ve got Tokyoflash watches coming out the wazoo. But — I had to swallow them first. Product Site

iClean is a 99¢ iPhone/iPod Touch application that makes it look like a dog is lick-cleaning your screen from the inside out. How precious! Currently there are only three lickers available, but more are promised in future updates . I just bought it! Best 99¢ I’ve ever spent. Well, except for the time I put $1 in a vending machine and got two bags of Doritos. There was a Cool Ranch hanger! iClean Brings Puppy Lick Fest To Your iPhone [iphonesavior] Thanks to Seth, who promises to make a human version soon. I can hardly wait! No thanks.