You read correctly, Earthlings, Neptune and Uranus may have shimmering seas of liquid diamond ! With giant diamond icebergs floating around in them. Aaaand I just claimed both planets for my own. I’m gonna be rich as shit you filthy little peasants! The idea that there are oceans of liquid diamond inside Neptune and Uranus is not a new idea, said Tom Duffy, a planetary scientist at Princeton University. The new Nature Physics article makes diamond oceans “look more and more plausible,” said Duffy. More research on the composition of Neptune and Uranus is needed before a truly definitive conclusion can be made, however, and this kind of research is very difficult to conduct. I dunno. You can read a much more in-depth analysis of the data if you hit the link to the Discovery article, but it all sounds a little bit iffy to me. But is that gonna stop me from flying my spaceship straight through those bitches with my hands out the window? It is not. Diamond Oceans Possible on Uranus, Neptune [discovery] Thanks to wes g, who [insert joke about diamonds in Uranus here].

For those of you not in the know, Panera Bread is a fast-casual (don’t blame me, I didn’t make up the term) restaurant chain that offers free Wi-Fi to patrons. And this geezer is making the most of it — he brought his whole iMac into the restaurant and began playing World of Warcraft ! GO GRANDPA! Seriously I’m calling the police — we closed an hour ago. You Have Nothing to Apologize For, Panera Bread iMac Man [gizmodo] Thanks to Jessi, who once brought a netbook into a restaurant to use the free Wi-Fi but accidentally threw it away with her tray.

This is a graphic depicting what the internet goes through on a typical day. It’s pretty freakin’ impressive . But it also made me feel pretty insignificant. Then I realized I’m practically the ringleader of this circus (metaphor magic!) and that’s when I removed the hose from my exhaust pipe. How Huge Is the Internet on an Average Day? [gizmodo]

Sweeping a solid 27 of the 299 total write-in votes for New York City mayor, Charles Montgomery Burns certainly gave incumbent billionaire Michael Bloomburg a run for his money . Smithers — a body massage . Burns wasn’t the only fictional character to get votes in the race. Mad Magazine icon Alfred E. Newman, Fantastic Four arch-villain Victor Von Doom, Mickey Mouse, and Sleeping Beauty also received write-in votes. Many New York City and state political figures also got votes, including former New York City mayors Ed Koch, Rudy Giuliani, and David Dinkins. Others include Bill and Hillary Clinton, former New York governor George Pataki, Rep. Anthony Weiner, and the candidates from this year’s congressional race in New York’s 23rd district Dede Scozzafava and Doug Hoffman. Three historical figures also got votes: former presidents Abraham Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt, and Nazi dictator Adolf Hitler. Other noteworthy figures getting a nod were New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter, radio shock jock Howard Stern, deceased comedian Rodney Dangerfield, and Robert Burke, better known to many New Yorkers as “the Naked Cowboy.” Wait a minute — I didn’t get a single write-in? WTF New Yorkers? I lay in bed and toil over the internet all day for you and this is how you repay me? I ACTUALLY KNOW SOME OF YOU TOO! This hurts, this really hurts . Simpsons billionaire gets most write-in votes in NYC mayor race [cnn] Thanks to wes, Geekologie Writer 2012 campaign manager. I better win, wes.

This is a Penchan 5.5 Terapixel camera spotted in China . Sure the lens looks like a plastic rhinestone and it has a penguin humping a rock on the front, but that doesn’t mean it can’t have 5,500,000 mexapixels , right? It doesn’t. Remember: you can’t judge a book by it’s cover. Especially not on a Kindle cause then you’d judge them all the same! 5.5 Terapixels, Huh?: Mis-Advertising Much [gearfuse] Thanks to lee, who only sends me things that happened at least a year ago because he gets off on people yelling “OLD!” in the comments.

This is a Penchan 5.5 Terapixel camera spotted in China . Sure the lens looks like a plastic rhinestone and it has a penguin humping a rock on the front, but that doesn’t mean it can’t have 5,500,000 mexapixels , right? It doesn’t. Remember: you can’t judge a book by it’s cover. Especially not on a Kindle cause then you’d judge them all the same! 5.5 Terapixels, Huh?: Mis-Advertising Much [gearfuse] Thanks to lee, who only sends me things that happened at least a year ago because he gets off on people yelling “OLD!” in the comments.

Because there’s nothing safer than mixing vodka and pills ( or heavy machinery ), the Ruskie imbibeable (word wizardry!) may soon be available in powdered/pill form. Look out, Pixie Stix! (Picture unrelated, liquid vodka in gel-tabs). Russian professor Evgeny Moskalev of Saint Petersburg Technological University has evolved a technique that allows turning alcohol into powder and packing it in pills. “Dry” vodka can be wrapped in paper and carried around in a pocket or a bag. Vodka in form of a pill would come handy at parties when “consumers” would be able to calculate their exact required dosage. “Dry” vodka can be wrapped in paper and carried around in a pocket or a bag. Vodka in form of a pill would come handy at parties when “consumers” would be able to calculate the exact required dosage. “…Calculate the exact required dosage”? For what — puking on your shoes? No, I find this whole story a little suspect seeing how I already reported on powdered alcohol BACK IN APRIL . So, who really invented it, Mr. Evgeny Moskalev Cocktail?! It was God! Make it rain, big man, make it rain . Booze plague! Now, vodka that comes in a pill [timesofindia] and Picture [flickr] Thanks to Sasha, who once licked dry booze straight from the proverbial powdered alcohol cow’s teat.

Apparently the Burj Dubai (the world’s tallest building ) can’t stop getting hit by lightning . Well what do you expect being a half a mile tall ? That’s like a 7-foot woman walking around and people not yelling, “that’s a huge bitch!” Also, this may or may not be Allah’s way of saying, “Dubai — this shit’s getting out of hand” (It 100% is). Hit the jump for two more shots and a video of a lightning strike in action.

A stuffed squirrel on a Harley . Because nothing says, “Seriously, I f***ing have everything else” LIKE A TAXIDERMIED SQUIRREL ON A MOTORCYCLE . Wild Grey Squirrel on a HARLEY DAVISON MOTORBIKE………………. Great for any Motorbike fan…….. 16ins long. 6ins wide. 11.5ins high Would make a good Christmas present.. Created by an experienced Taxidermist Whew, well that’s a relief. Because for a second I was worried it was just created by an inexperienced driver who hit a squirrel and likes playing with dead animals. Which, for the record, really isn’t that weird. Is it, Mr. Opossum? Wave hi to all the readers! eBay Auction Thanks to Walrus, who isn’t stuffed with anything but blubber. Can I sleep on your belly?

In the third installment of the Symphony of Science series comes ‘Our Place In The Cosmos’, a quartet of interplanetary song by Carl Sagan, Richard Dawkins, Michio Kaku and Robert Jastrow. This is definitely the “Barry White” song of the series so far, and there is no doubt in my mind you could make out with a legally blind woman to it. Also, do you think it’s just a coincidence the video is 4:20 long OR IS THE UNIVERSE TRYING TO TELL US SOMETHING? Pack the bong, STAT. I’m coming, God! Symphony of Science Project and Youtube Thanks to Jonathan and Kelly C., who once sang into a telescope thinking it was a giant mic.