The Fridge Locker is a little lockbox that you put in the fridge to keep your broke-ass roommate from eating all your string cheese and pudding packs. I need one . No, make that two. I have lots of pudding and I like it cooooold. The metal combination lock keeps your food safe from “Refrig-A Raiders” (poor joke courtesy of the manufacturer). It measures 7.5″ wide, 7.5″ tall and 11″ deep. At $20, it could easily pay for itself with all of the food it keeps safe. Granted, your roommate will not take kindly to seeing this. Purchase and install at your own risk. Knowing my roommate, that bastard would probably pull this thing out and set it on the radiator just to spoil all my food and spite me. Yeah, he’s a jerk. He’s also my alter ego. Shut up! NO YOU SHUT UP! Let me type the last sentence. No, you type too slow. OW HE’S BITING MY FINGERS! Fridge Locker Keeps Your Food Safe [ohgizmo]

Holy shit, it’s a PVC pipe bomb! No, not really. It’s the Knock Lock, a homebrew door lock that will only release the deadbolt if you perform the secret knock. Cooooool — I want one for my clubhouse! A microphone (okay, really a speaker) presses against the door and listens for knocks. If it hears the right number of knocks in the right cadence it triggers the motor to turn the deadbolt and unlock the door. If the sequence isn’t recognized, the system resets and listens for knocks again. There’s a very worthwhile video after the jump of the lock in action. The only problem is every time you perform a knock your neighbors learn how to gain access to your apartment. Still, neat idea. But I’ll just stick with my tried and true knock: KICK IN THE DOOR, WAVIN’ THE FOUR-FOUR, ALL YOU HEARD WAS GW DON’T HIT ME NO MORE!! I’m serious, don’t make me pistol-whip you. Hit the jump for another shot and the video.

Sometimes it’s the simplest things that are best. Like a bacon sandwich on a crisp morning or tricking a dinosaur into thinking another meteor is coming so you can bed it that night. And then there’s this keyring. Which is both key AND keyring. What will they think of next?!? Carry your keys on your other key. Real working key blank. Key blank can be cut by any key cutter to fit KW1 or SC1 keyways. You can get a 2-pack for $7, which, according to my calculations, makes a 4-pack about $18. What? I NEVER LEARNED THE MATHS, OKAY? But you know what — YOU DON’T NEED ALGEOMETRY TO KNOW HOW TO BLOG! Or any skills really. Just a drinking problem. Split Ring Key [amronexperimental] Thanks to Scott, who actually invented the thing. Nice, now how about a door that is both door AND knob. Oh I’m sorry, did I just blow everybody’s minds?

Well, actually, it’s a tie. First, a liquor store robber who probably had his mommy drive him there while he finished his juice box. Police say a 19-year-old who tried to rob a liquor store sat down and cried after 76-year-old owner locked him in the store. The man was accused of trying to rob Sykes Liquor Store in Trenton Monday night. Police said the owner, who was behind the counter, triggered the lock after the man grabbed a bottle of Hennessy cognac and bolted for the door. The man then allegedly pulled out a handgun and demanded to be released. But the owner said he saw that the gun was a fake, refused to unlock the door and called police. Police said the suspect threw away the gun, slumped to the floor and was crying when officers arrived to arrest him. Wow, that is both sad and awesome at the same time. Kind of like the first time I had sex, but without the — oh wait, he was crying. Yep, exactly like that then. Next, an idiotic failure at life who called 911 after “locking” herself in her car . A woman called Kissimmee police to say she was locked inside her car at the Walgreen’s on John Young Parkway near Poinciana. “My car will not start. I’m locked inside my car,” the unidentified woman said. “Nothing electrical works. And it’s getting very hot in here, and I’m not feeling well.” The dispatcher asked the woman if she was able to manually pull the lock up on the door. The woman said she would try, and then, she said, “Yes, I got the door open.” Can we please get that woman’s license revoked? And also, oxygen supply. If only she hadn’t gotten reception….damn you, Verizon network! Man cries after attempt to rob liquor store fails [yahoonews] and Woman to 911: Help! I’m locked inside my car [orlandosentinel] Thanks to Joemo and Jason, who have never cried because when they feel a tear coming they just punch themselves in the eye until it goes away.