The female orgasm , like a unicorn , is a rare and mythical creature. Unless you’re like me, in which case they’re like plain ol’ deer: you see them all the time , and, move often than not, have to swerve to avoid hitting them with your car. Well this is an informational graphic explaining the phenomenon, which, from what I gathered, is like a total eclipse for some couples. Unless you’re like me, then it’s like the sun in California: you see it all the time, but you don’t want to stare directly at it. Wait, I’m thinking of Medusa. You see, Medusa is like a vagina…. Hit the jump for the whole, very informative chart. Go on — maybe you’ll learn something!

In bad news for guys who can’t grow a beard , a recent study indicates that women find a little facial hair and a geeky personality the two biggest turn-ons . Really? THEN WHY HAVEN’T I EVER SEEN A BOOB?! Despite complaining that it looks unkempt and feels rough to touch, the unshaven look on a man is actually a turn-on for 41 per cent of women. A slightly geeky personality came second, proving that women really do like a guy who knows their stuff when it comes to technology. A hairy chest was voted third, followed by a man who loves to read or cries at a soppy film. Other secret turn-ons to feature in the top ten include grey hair, glasses and being a passionate supporter of a sports team. The poll of 2,500 women also revealed that 91 per cent would actually prefer a guy who had a few flaws over someone who is perfect. And more than half would rather a guy who was soft and cuddly instead of toned and muscly. Jesus, you’d think I was God’s gift to women the way that list reads. Well, provided God’s gift to women glues pubes to his face and cheers for the Steelers. WHICH HE DOES. The perfect man is a geek with facial stubble… women’s secret turn-ons revealed [dailymail] Thanks to Comfort Eagle, who still made me feel better despite pecking my eyes out.

NASA, in a covert attempt to mine Martian cheese , wants to send scientists to the moon in the form of avatars, just like in the movie by the same! ( Avatar , not Martian cheese — although that shit has blockbuster written all over it too). NASA can put humanoids on the Moon in just 1000 days. They would be controlled by scientists on Earth using motion capture suits, giving them the feeling of being on the lunar surface. The 1000-day mark is quite plausible, since the mission would be a lot simpler than a human-based one. It will also be quite cheaper than the real thing. First, you don’t have to care about life support systems, which will make spacecraft manufacturing a lot less complex. The whole system would also weight a lot less, reducing the need for the development of a huge rocket, and again reducing the costs. Ha, I love how in the robot in the video stares at his fingers for a full minute like, “holy shit, what the f*** are these?!” Great programming, NASA. And, hypothetically, if my avatar decided to get drunk on moon juice and chase some alien snizz, would I single-handedly restore interest in outerspace and save NASA from the brink of funding collapse? Yes, I would. AND YOU BETTER RENAME A PLANET AFTER ME. NASA Project M Puts Scientists’ Avatars On the Moon [gizmodo]

Want to learn more about Google ? Then peep the rest of this informational graphic , son, it’s all about that search bitch! Say, who knew Google did more than run a query page and drive around taking pictures ? I mean besides me because I basically built their business model out of little plastic pieces and airplane glue. But mostly airplane glue. What? It helps me think! Hit the jump to see the whole thing, with many more facts and figurines!

This is a chick with ass for days playing some racing game on XBox 360 . First one to name the game in the comments obviously missed the point of this post. Also, you think she shakes her ass around for the camera, or that’s really how she games? Either way I was waiting for the chair to break. Tahiticora est une gameuse, une vraie… Mais en String! [natchers]

The logo has a subliminal character included! It’s Pac-Man ! Well, Pac-Man AFTER I BROKE HIS YELLOW-ASS JAW FOR EATING MY CHERRIES. I called them first, jerk! Oh, the Missus called — she said you should eat out . I assume she meant literally, like at a restaurant, because I saw her ankles-up in Blinky’s van earlier. Sorry you had to hear it from me. No I’m not (I called those strawberries too, dick). Hidden Code in LG Logo [buzzfeed] Thanks to Jessica, who’s convinced Dig-Dug is hiding in the Samsung logo. You’re f***ing crazy.

The logo has a subliminal character included! It’s Pac-Man ! Well, Pac-Man AFTER I BROKE HIS YELLOW-ASS JAW FOR EATING MY CHERRIES. I called them first, jerk! Oh, the Missus called — she said you should eat out . I assume she meant literally, like at a restaurant, because I saw her ankles-up in Blinky’s van earlier. Sorry you had to hear it from me. No I’m not (I called those strawberries too, dick). Hidden Code in LG Logo [buzzfeed] Thanks to Jessica, who’s convinced Dig-Dug is hiding in the Samsung logo. You’re f***ing crazy.

Casttoos are tattoos for casts. The company makes a number of different standard designs (flames, tribal stuff, etc), but the coolest available is a custom version of your actual brokeback bones . You just email the company a scan of your x-ray , and they send you a waterproof tattoo to apply to your cast. It’s as simple as that! And, as a guy whose shattered his arm twice defending a woman’s honor….turns out she was a slut. Oh well, you live and learn . (I WANT MY ARM BACK, HUSSY!) Product Site via Make your arm cast see-thru with Casttoo [dvice]

Let’s face it, golf courses aren’t as safe as they used to be. So I’ll be damned if I’m cruising around the links in an unprotected buggy . Thankfully, now there’s the $45K Anti-Terrorist Assault Cart (Atac). *thwack* Fore! GO GO GO!! It weighs just under half a tonne, has bullet-proof windows and contains numerous firing ports. Furthermore it is able to negotiate corridors and lifts. Metaltech says the squat and heavily armoured vehicle can also withstand grenade blasts and last for six hours on a single charge - with a top speed of 25km/h (15mph). Sure being able to withstand grenade blasts is a huge plus, but I feel like those tires are just begging to be popped. I mean, for $45K I was expecting tank treads. Which, haha, of course I’d still drive on the greens! Jesus, it’s not like I’m gonna do donuts (unless I par). ‘Anti-terror buggy’ unveiled by firm in India [bbcnews] Thanks to Mr. H, who developed a crush on Ms. I because they always had to sit next to each other in homeroom.

Who’s Your Daddy (that’s easy, I am) Real Bacon Homemade Potato Chips ($5) are exactly what they sound like: deliciousness incarnate. Bet you can’t eat just one (bag) you glutton you. We start with the best quality potatoes and add a proprietary blend of some extra-bacony goodness. They will put a grin on your face and promise to test your limits of self-control. It is our stated mission that you have a heightened sense of expectation before opening a bag of our Real Bacon Handmade Potato Chips that is exceeded every single time that bag is opened. Enjoy! Oh I’m going to enjoy all right, ENJOY SUING YOUR PANTS OFF FOR KILLING ME! You think ghosts can’t sue? Ghosts can sue. Just ask Casper. He’s been after that free candy van guy for years for passing out laced candy. Ha, good luck with that, Casper. Say mister, have any Jujyfruits? Product Site via Bacon Potato Chips [uncrate] Thanks to Chuey the midget, who, despite his small size, can still win competitive eating contests.