It was only a matter of time: a case for Apple’s iPad that looks like a giant sanitary napkin . I know, I’m puking in my shoes even as I type. BURN HOT WINGS BURN. Introducing Hip Handmaids’ exclusive iMaxi–the only Apple iPad case made with protective wings! With its durable vinyl outer layer and plush, quilted-cotton sleeve, the iMaxi helps keep your iPad clean and dry. Plus, the iMaxi’s Velcro-latched, advanced wing design wraps snugly around your device, so your iPad always stays where it should. Best of all, it shields it from all those unsightly and embarrassing data leaks that would make any motherboard worry! The cases cost $30 and come in all white, or with an even more disturbing “bloody” red interior (pic after the jump). WTF?! I’m all for prop-comedy but even Gallagher has the draw the line somewhere…. Did anybody else just flashback to the video of the girl crushing the watermelon ? Hit the jump to see the bloodier version.

Poopsenders.com is a service that allows you to send bags of animal feces to people you don’t like. I assume it was created by a zoo employee because it’s not just cow dung that’s available, you can also opt for elephant and gorilla scat in quart and gallon sizes ($13-$24). It’s real too because I went through the entire ordering process ( The Superficial Writer has a birthday coming up). Well, that or I just got scammed. But I hope not because I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he opens that box and I run up behind him and smash his face in it and set him on fire. Best present ever! Official Site Thanks to Jcon, who sent a box to himself because he’s sick like that. You need help bro.

This is a Jabba the Hutt cake made for somebody’s birthday. I would eat it, despite all the diseases he’s undoubtedly carrying BECAUSE I’M A RISK TAKER. This is my birthday cake this year — Jabba the Hutt. A friend of the family kindly made this for us and I think she did a fantastic job (she also made my iPhone cake 3 years ago). My four-year-old son likes Jabba’s son Rotta and requested that the cake have Jabba and Rotta hugging, so that’s what we did. Jabba is made of chocolate cake, chocolate fudge, and fondant. I mean Jabba looks okay but you know what really got me? The ‘Happy Birthday’ there. I thought it was Photoshop text at first but that shit is totally fondant. I’m calling the Y! Seriously, I want to know what time the pool opens. HIt the jump for several more including one of the cake post-cut.

A bunch of French Canadians (you sound so funny!) decided to cover their friend in $37 of raw bacon and film it with the hopes of being featured on Geekologie. And, because I’m basically a super handsome ‘Make a Wish’ foundation, here it is. Per babelfish translation: We had the brilliant idea d’ to buy for 37 dollar of bacon and to do something with that nobody n’ could have made. moin d’ has; to be insane or belong to Philwillpic (thus insane) We did that to send photograph on the site of www.geekologie.com for qu’ they appear for finally carrying out one of our great dream, to be on geekology!!! Thank you with - neilmu- for the fauleuse song qu’ it has to grant to us to take Apparently they cooked and ate the bacon after, which is pretty gross, but I would have done the same thing. Shit, one time I ate a strip of bacon after it fell off my plate and bounced under the stove. It was hairy. Money shot at 1:55, but you’re gonna want to stop watching around 2:05, because things get strangely homoerotic after that. You’ve been warned (I watched it twice!). Youtube Thanks william and phil, but you should have cooked him.

This is a taxidermied mouse with a flash drive wedged up its ass . It reminds me spying days when I made off with a bunch of top secret files from the Pentagon. Except that wasn’t a flash drive , it was a stack of 5¼-inch floppies. And let me tell you: based on the way I was walking you would’ve sworn they were only 3½-inchers. I sashayed out of there like a f***ing runway model! Hit the jump for a video of the mouse in action (his LED eyes blink during data transfer!).

This is a taxidermied mouse with a flash drive wedged up its ass . It reminds me spying days when I made off with a bunch of top secret files from the Pentagon. Except that wasn’t a flash drive , it was a stack of 5¼-inch floppies. And let me tell you: based on the way I was walking you would’ve sworn they were only 3½-inchers. I sashayed out of there like a f***ing runway model! Hit the jump for a video of the mouse in action (his LED eyes blink during data transfer!).

Avatar has finally sunk Titantic, passing the $1.292 billion mark this weekend in its overseas' haul to take the title as the top grossing film of all time. Titanic held the record for the past 13 years, with an…

Holiday Inn, best known for putting me up last night and providing me with the sleep I needed to pilot my flight back home this morning, is now offering a complementary human bed warming service at its London Kensington location (pissing will still cost extra). If requested, a willing member of hotel staff will jump in your bed, dressed head to foot in an all-in-one sleeper suit, until your nightly chamber warms up. Holiday Inn spokeswoman Jane Bednall described the plan as something like having a “giant hot water bottle in your bed.” Really, Jane? Was the metaphor really necessary? I’d like to think everyone here can imagine what a stranger in a bunny suit lying in their bed is like. Like awesome. I call little spoon! Holiday Inn Offers ‘Human Bed-Warming Service’ to Combat Icy Sheets [foxnews] Thanks to Jay, who’s only interested if there are different costume options.

NOTE : BELIEVE ME, YOU DON’T WANT TO HIT THE JUMP (God I’m good at getting extra pageviews). So a sheep in Turkey (you’re not a bird!) gave birth to a lamb with a human face . Except the lamb was already dead and had to be cut out via c-section. Apparently it was some kind of horrific mutation . God I’m depressed now. Erhan Elibol, a vet, performed a caesarean on the animal to take the lamb out, but was horrified to see that the features of the lamb’s snout bore a striking resemblance to a human face. Vets said that the rare mutation most likely occurred as a result of improper mutation since the fodder for the lamb’s mother was abundant with vitamin A, CNNTurk.com reports. The mutant creature was hairless. Local residents said that even dogs were afraid to approach the bizarre animal. The locals burnt the body of the little goat, and biologists had no chance to study the rare mutation. You can see the uncensored shot after the jump if you want, but I strongly advise against it. THE PICTURE CANNOT BE UNSEEN, no matter how roughly you sandpaper your eyes (I recommend at least an 80-grit). Hit it if you want, but I wouldn’t if I was you.

Remember the story about the 16-year old boy and 42-year old cougar hyena that met playing World of Warcraft and decided to bump warlocks in real life ? Well the woman was arrested at the airport in Texas after returning from visiting the boy in Canada . And her nipples were still hard from the cold. Donna Hawkins, a spokesperson for the Harris County District Attorney’s Office, told CTV.ca that the two allegedly “engaged in a cybersexual relationship” for more than a year. It is alleged that Price and the teenager “engaged in some sexual activity” before they were discovered, said Hawkins. Barrie police questioned Price, but found that she had not broken any law since the age of consent is 16. In Texas, however, the age of consent is 17, and Harris County prosecutors charged Price despite the fact that the alleged offence did not occur locally, said Hawkins. Price has been charged with two counts of online solicitation of a minor and one count of child enticement. None of the charges have been proven in court. Interesting, but do you know what has been proven in court? My right to flex. Second amendment baby! *swish* Texas woman who flew to meet Barrie teen, arrested [sympatico] Thanks to Alioth, who’s a level 80 Chris Hansen.